Thursday, September 3, 2009

changes

More changes in my life...
Little ones really...
For years, I have attended a bible study most Wednesday mornings, then went to a doc's office to teach people how to use their insulin pumps.
Both things that I like to do very much.
This week, my schedule at my "real" job abruptly changed- no Wednesdays off. And yet another boss quit at the company I do the pump trainings for.
These, admittedly, are little things. Not big- like my son leaving for college in a couple weeks- or like the things we have been through in the past few months.
Still..... I was so looking forward to resuming a feeling of "normal" Guess that is an illusion anyway.
Have you ever seen a cutting horse competition? Fascinating. The horse is set on one cow, and no matter what direction the cow goes- the horse is there to cut it off and head it in a particular direction. The horses are phenomenal. Push button.
I had the great pleasure and the great challenge of riding one for a few months. Beau. Big, beautiful, black horse. You had only to sit on his back (and stay seated!) and he would do the work. The slightest touch of a leg against his side was a signal to him. He stopped on a dime. I know that, because there were times that he stopped and I didn't. You get the picture!
Anyway- it sortof feels like that in my life now. Like no matter what direction I turn, Someone is nudging me in a new direction. I keep trying to get back to where we were before the leukemia hit.... but it seems like that is not to be.
It seems that illustration leaves me as the cow!
Months ago, I used the words "a new normal" I guess that is where we are heading. I have the feeling it's going to be good..... better than where we were before.
At the end of a cutting horse competition, the cow trots off zestily and a huge cheer goes up from the crowd
I guess this is not a bad place to be.....

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