Sunday, October 11, 2009

we worry

A week of blood sugars between 350 -400 brought my eldest son home early this week. Looking sallow, peuky ( is that a word?) generally just plain ugh...

I am proud of him though... he has handled it, he did the best he could all week, and knew when he was over his head and it was time to call uncle

Diagnosed with juvenile diabetes at age 9- this is familar ground, yet we worry....

He scheduled a visit with his endocrinologist- made the trip there himself, had some adjustments made and was told he is doing a "good job"

The last statement was probably the most significant for him. It is amazing how these kids base their self worth, and subsequently their compliance on whether or not the adults in their lives think they are doing a "good job" It is fascinating to see and hear how they rebell against the very things that save and enhance their lives... It is amazing how quickly perfectionism rears it's ugly head... convincing them that they will never be good enough....

They do the things we all do.... in one way or another.... yet for them, the outcome of their life and physical health hangs in a delicate balance.

He's back at school tonight. Last week was rough.

I'm grateful for the advances science has made that enable him to have some illusion of control. I'm more grateful for the adults who have come along beside him- for one in particular, Dr Sam Wentworth of Indianna. Without him, I don't believe we would be where we are today. I'm grateful for the on line community I have found.

One day at a time.... one day at a time.....



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